the ONLY honest politician in America! ™

He’s the ONLY politician  willing to  publicly admit  what all OTHER politicians are quietly thinking:

 campaign_me_with_money_tinified

“I’m PRIMARILY  in this for the money  and with  your WRITE-IN  VoteI will become America’s Next  $Multimillionaire  politician!  Let’s  do  this!

Independent!  Unaffiliated!  NON-partisan!

And THE officially Registered  WRITE-IN candidate as YOUR  Representative in Congress for CT’s  3rd  Congressional district.

TRASH  trash  Rosa   DeLauro 

instead,  WRITE-IN your vote for the ONLY genuinely honest politician:

Christopher  Schaefer!

Here’s my utterly unique—and refreshingly honest!—30 Point Plan for “saving America”:

Enjoy my “30 Point” political SatireBUT continue to scroll down to The Serious Stuff” to see what I’m REALLY about: I am the ONLY Candidate Addressing Failed, destructive, racist War on Drugs; Comprehensive prison-Criminal Justice reform;.Fed Budget referendum via your Income Tax Return; Shake up our rotten system of $Multimillionaire politicians!If you really want to End Political Corruption SHARE this. ]

1. National Infrastructure Bankruptcy Act.

DeLauro’s annually proposed “Infrastructure Bank” is a pathetic attempt to expand her “pay-to-play” kick-back scam to construction unions, that pay MASSIVE amounts of money to keep her in office.

In sharp contrast, MY bill will OVERTLY and PUBLICLY politicize the process of funding infrastructure projects. Currently, if a contractor contributes to a politician’s re-election campaign, various behind closed doors deals are made to ensure that these SAME contractors get plum government contracts to rebuild highways, etc.

behind closed doors

MY bill will END this sneaky “behind the scenes” dealing that goes on. Instead, if you are a contractor AND contribute to my re-election campaign—my bill will GUARANTEE that you receive a lucrative government contract!

Christopher Schaefer: returning  Openness to YOUR government!

2. New Haven  Mafia  Rehabilitation Act.

New Haven’s one-party “Crony PayBack Machine” was structured long ago

by New Haven’s  Mafia front man, Arthur T. Barbieri:

http://www.connecticutmag.com/history/the-history-of-the-mafia-in-connecticut/article_0ec8879d-1367-5fcd-9493-3b5ecf5e7294.html 

And  Rosa DeLauro has been a part of it—from the Very Beginning

DeLauro: “Arthur Barbieri has been an inspiration and a mentor to me over the years and also worked closely with my mother and father, Alderman and Alderwoman Ted and Luisa DeLauro.” https://www.gpo.gov/fdsys/pkg/CREC-1996-01-23/html/CREC-1996-01-23-pt1-PgE57-4.htm

Sadly, With the exception of DeLauro, the Mafia itself  no longer is a force in New Haven—but the crony Machine that Arthur Barbieri built is  still Very Much with us!

THEREFORE, to honor the lasting contributions that  the Mafia has made to New Haven and its “unique form of government”, I will propose Federal  legislation re-naming the DeLauro monument on Wooster Square from “The Family Table” to the more  endearing

“Una  Famiglia  Mafiosa”

DeLauro Mafia family table tinified

Christopher Schaefer:  honoring those who  paved  the way!

3. Campaign Money Laundering Normalization Act.

DeLauro_and_bags_of_money_tinified_50

Back in 2013, after I had revealed*  that Rosa DeLauro has been laundering $Millions and $Millions of campaign donations over the years into her husband’s business, via the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee (DCCC) and therefore—right back into her own pocket!—this caused the data to  temporarily DISAPPEAR from OpenSecrets. org until I contacted them to point out this data breach.

DeLauro: I will fight to end the broken campaign finance system. Like this isn’t working well enough for her ALREADY?!

But Listen: I personally don’t feel that ANY careerist politician who has gamed the system SO successfully as Rosa DeLauro has done, for SO many years, should suddenly feel pressured to cover up her activity via OpenSecrets merely out of fear that she might be investigated by the Congressional Ethics Committee.

Because—let’s face it: nearly EVERYONE in Congress is engaged in some sort of dishonest, self-dealing scheme!

THEREFORE, my “Campaign Money Laundering Normalization Act” finally will take the heat off of our elected representatives by officially making it perfectly acceptable, legal  AND ethical  to profit from campaign donations!  My bill will eliminate the need to fabricate some convoluted campaign money-laundering scheme, like Rosa DeLauro uses. INSTEAD, any campaign donations not spent on the campaign itself—can be directly pocketed by the politician. Not only will this simplify the use of one’s political office as a means of self-enrichment, it ALSO will save YOU the  voter from excessive campaign ads! If politicians know that they can keep whatever  they don’t spend on their campaign, they’ll think twice before filming another  blathering TV ad or printing more ugly lawn signs.

And THAT will be a plus for ALL of us!

*https://rosadelauroexposed.wordpress.com/money-trail/

Christopher Schaefer:  making  government Ethics—Obsolete!

4. Congressional  $Millionaire-Making  Efficiency Act.

Currently it takes an average of 3 terms in Congress for a Representative to become a $Millionaire. Sadly, it actually took Rosa DeLauro FOUR terms in office—that’s EIGHT Whole Years!—before she had enough cash to pay for her $2 Million mansion (where she ACTUALLY lives) at  816 East Capitol St NE Washington DC 20003    [Google© street view:]

DeLauro_Greenberg_mansion tinified

This is an outrageous example of government WASTE and inefficiency. To streamline the process, I will introduce the Congressional $Millionaire-Making Efficiency ActWith my bill, lobbyists, state and city government officials, contractors, business CEOs, etc. will be required to submit their best “PayBack” arrangement to each member of Congress—immediately after the annual opening session of Congress. This will allow Senators and Representatives to compare all offers  simultaneously, thereby choosing the best and quickest way to cash in on their political office. With my bill, virtually ANY member of Congress should be able to become a $Millionaire—in Just ONE term!

Of course, one of the potential downsides to accepting such massive amounts of money, is that a Representative might accidentally call for legislation that is opposed by their donors. FOR EXAMPLE, every year DeLauro accepts $10,000 from American Crystal Sugarhttp://www.opensecrets.org/politicians/contrib.php?cid=N00000615&cycle=2016&type=C&newMem=N&recs=100

while SIMULTANEOUSLY saying we need to TAX sugar-added food products!

THERFORE, to prevent such embarrassing gaffs, my legislation ALSO will call for creation of a computer database, designed specifically to help Representatives better match their largest bribes with “supportive legislative proposals”.

Although government cannot create prosperity for citizens, it CAN create prosperity for members of Congress!

Christopher Schaefer: improving  the Efficiency of  “YOUR” government

5. Wealth-Related  Congressional  Term Limits.

Each year, a member of Congress introduces some pathetic bill calling for a limited number of  terms for members of the House and Senate. Such proposals inevitably die “in committee”, because there’s No WAY  Congress will impose term limits on its members—because Congress is the best system EVER Invented to become fabulously  wealthy!

THEREFORE, in my utterly novel approach to a problem that MOST voters see as vital to restoring a functional government, my Term Limits bill will NOT  be based on some ‘random number’ of terms—but  INSTEAD will be wealth-related. Specifically, once a member of Congress has abused their elected office via cronyism, kickbacks, graft, money-laundering and the like, to massively increase their personal wealth, they will be required to resign within 14 years AFTER having amassed a personal wealth exceeding  $5 Million.

Even if my legislation FAILS to pass, I personally  promise YOU my future constituents  that I will  limit my own Congressional terms to an  accumulated wealth of $Five Million. AND I then will resign within 14 years AFTER having passed that wealth benchmark!  And THAT’S a promise you can trust, because I,  Christopher Schaefer,  am

“the ONLY  honest politician in America!”™

6. The Alternating Economy ‘Blame’ and ‘Credit’ Act.

The very few remaining economists who are actually honest and unbiased will point out that our government has a rapidly DE-creasing ability to affect the USA economy in any way WhatSoEver—either  positively OR negatively. This is due to the increasing Globalization of our economy, as well as the economic impact of  innumerable international factors, such as China’s currency manipulation, international political or labor unrest, natural disasters, etc.—over which our OWN government has  absolutely NO  control.   Despite This, whenever our own economy shows positive signs of growth via economic indicators—that have NO impact  whatsoever on the lives of MOST  Americans—the political party then in power will take credit for these  signs of economic growth. Conversely, when the economy tanks—which usually DOES affect nearly ALL  Americans!—EXCEPT politicians, Wall Street brokers and bankers—then the party that’s NOT in power will blame the party that IS in power.

two_congressmen_arguing tinified

To end this worthless partisan charade, my Alternating Economy ‘Blame’ and ‘Credit’ Act  will require that the 2 main political parties take turns Each Month, accepting blame for any  “negative economic indicators”, while the OTHER party takes credit for any  “positive economic indicators”. The Dept. of Commerce; Bureau of Economic Analysis; Economics & Statistics Admin.  all will be Merged into a single bipartisan committee—so that “economic indicators” can be manipulated to favor each party on alternating months. Likewise the “bipartisan” Congressional Budget Office—which ALREADY  produces economic impact projections that are Totally  WORTHLESS—would be required to FURTHER  manipulate its “projections” to provide a more blatant partisan bias, favoring the views of the two opposing political parties—on  alternating months.

Christopher Schaefer:  permanently fixing our economy—by  “fixing” the data!

7. It’s Time to Go Act.

Rosa DeLauro has done NOTHING to preserve Medicare or Social Security from impending bankruptcy—despite being in office for Twenty-Five Years! And DESPITE the Social Security Administration’s repeated warnings that both programs are headed for insolvency. And DESPITE DeLauro’s constant pandering to Senior Citizens—solely to get re-elected.

Christopher  Schaefer  finally will bring about REAL  reform to Medicare and Social Security. I permanently will end the  chronic under-funding  and future  instability of these programs—by introducing the It’s Time to Go Act.  Upon reaching the age of 65, every American, whether here legally or not, will be placed on a one-way, no-return cruise to the country of their choice. All  ABSOLUTELY  free!

Cruise passengers seniors tinified

This will be paid for by the IMMENSE savings of no longer having all those Resource-Sucking  Seniors around anymore. Of course, members of Congress will be TOTALLY exempt, since they receive extraordinary pension benefits and vacation time wildly out of line with those of the private sector—so don’t NEED  any of YOUR  pathetic “safety net” programs—and  therefore will  NEVER  be a burden to society!

Christopher Schaefer:  clearing the way for the Next Generation!

8Computer-Generated  Form Letter Response Act.

In my numerous travels throughout Connecticut’s  3rd Congressional district, a common complaint I hear from voters—from YOU, my future  constituents!—is  that, when writing or emailing Rosa DeLauro on various topics, they often will receive the Exact Same computer-generated response—to inquiries on Completely Different topics!  And this is DESPITE the fact that DeLauro has THE largest staff on Capitol Hill—with an annual payroll exceeding $1Million!

DeLauro form letter

THEREFORE, my bill will fund the creation of a new generation of  Form Letter Spewing computer programs, which will create MILLIONS of new custom, personalized responses to voters’ letters and emails. As your elected Representative, I promise to take time away from my lavish weekly gourmet banquets, Taxpayer Funded trips, etc. and  PERSONALLY sign TEN of these form letters.  Every.  Single.  Week.

Christopher Schaefer:  adding  the “personal touch”  to  “Representative”!

9. The Boomers Screwed Us, Make Them Pay Act.

If you’re a Millennial or Gen Xer, you perhaps are not aware that the Baby Boomer generation has left you with such a staggering national debt that YOUR personal, individual share alone is nearly $1Million. Even worse, a baby born today inherits an individual debt of $1½ Million! Add to this, any crushing college debt and, well basically—you’re all totally screwed.

Millennials_debt_91

So myThe Boomers Screwed Us, Make Them Pay Act is YOUR chance to Get Even!  My bill will require that all assets of anyone who is a Boomer be garnished monthly, until their own share of the mess THEY created has been paid off.

Yeah, I know: I myself am a Boomer. So why would I propose a bill that would be such a disaster for ME personally? Because

  1. Most of you folks don’t even bother to vote and
  2. I’ll be dead—and so will Rosa DeLauro—by the time your generation realizes that you’ve All been Totally Screwed!   

Rosa DeLauro has been in office for 25 years—and not a Single Bill she has ever introduced has been passed. So why should any of MY bills fare any better? Nevertheless, offering your generation a false sense of  hope with my legislative proposals makes terrific  campaign material!  And the fact that I’m actually admitting this to you, is why I’m

“the ONLY honest politician in America!”™

Christopher Schaefer: Offering new False  promises For a New, Totally-Screwed generation!                    

10. Communist  Enclave  Manufacturing Act.

Even before our Cuban embassy was re-opened, Rosa DeLauro made numerous Taxpayer Funded trips to Cuba, in an effort to normalize trade—despite DeLauro’s repeated claims to oppose “outsourcing of American jobs”.

DeLauro’s rationale is that most of our consumer goods ALREADY are being manufactured by repressive, despotic, autocratic, totalitarian, corrupt Communist regimes, such as China—DESPITE voters’ expressed “concerns” about forced labor camps, abuse of child workers, etc.

And DESPITE the fact that imported Communist-made goods are THE major contributing factor in the 40-year decline of the Middle Class.

And DeLauro  ACTUALLY  has a valid point: we still  buy this  stuff anyway!    

Chinese toy factory

 THEREFORE, following China’s “two-system” model, which allows a “modified capitalism” to thrive in Hong Kong,  my bill likewise will establish a “two-system” model—right  here in Connecticut!  China, Cuba and North Korea will be permitted to establish a semi-autonomous enclave of  factories here in Connecticut: an enclave where US laws won’t apply!

My bill will have several ENORMOUS benefits: most of our consumer goods  sold in the USA still will be manufactured at minimal cost, by slave-laborers, child workers, etc. under the sole jurisdiction of tyrannical Communist overlords—just like today!    

HOWEVER, it no longer will be necessary for these goods to be shipped from overseas;   this will lower the costs of such goods even MORE for you, the consumer!    And WITHOUT any job-killing “Trans Pacific Partnership”!  Additionally, we once again will proudly see the label “Made in America” on nearly ALL of our consumer goods!

Finally, in recognition for all that DeLauro’s  good friend Joelle Fishman, Chair of the Connecticut Communist Party, has accomplished over the years, Joelle will be given a special “place of honor” on the assembly line of her choice in this Communist factory enclave, so that “Comrade Fishman” finally can live out her ‘proletariat dream’.

chinese sweatshop tinified

Christopher Schaefer:  making America’s Hypocrisy obsolete!—while looking out for YOU, the consumer!

11. Dependent Forever Act.

Under the current Affordable Healthcare Act, people can stay on their parents’ insurance until age 26. HOWEVER, when my “It’s Time to Go Act” becomes law (see above), I will replace this perk with the Dependent Forever Act. This will give all adult “children” the right to stay in their parents’ homes—indefinitely!  When their parents are removed via the “It’s Time to Go Act”, these “kids” will have a permanent place to call their own!

adult_kids_at_home tinified

Christopher Schaefer:  bringing  fairness  into the 21st Century!

12. Jobs and Education.

When it comes to jobs, anyone under the age of 30 doesn’t really have much of a future—regardless  of how much education they have acquired, or how many Utterly Worthless Degrees they have obtained. THEREFORE, I will introduce bills to abolish the Department of Education AND the Department of Labor, make schooling entirely voluntary—and use the  $$Billions  saved to expand “supplementary income” programs, so that every citizen OR non-citizen residing here will have a Guaranteed  Lifetime  income from the Federal  government, that will pay enough to raise a family and live in dignity, with a sense of purpose.

This finally will put an End to the chronic “Food Insecurity”  which, as Rosa DeLauro CONSTANTLY reminds us, is everywhereRight Here in Connecticut:

starving tinified

AND, in combination with my “Dependent Forever Act”,  my legislative initiatives will utterly eliminate the need for ANYONE to engage in any sort of  productive labor!

obesity tinified

 Christopher Schaefer:  bringing full-time Leisure  into the  Mainstream!

13. Manufacturing  Stimulation  via  Gun Control  Act.

Whenever there is a particularly news-worthy shooting of minority  ‘People of Color’, government officials immediately call for “peace”, “love” and an “impartial investigation”.  HOWEVER, whenever there is a notorious  shooting that includes at least some WHITE  victims, Rosa DeLauro and other members of Congress see a golden opportunity to create an “issue” and demand further gun-control legislation.

This causes a predictable FRENZY of gun-buying throughout the country!  According to the FBI’s “Nat. Instant Criminal Background Check System” (required to purchase a gun), there were 9 million pre-purchase background checks in 1999.

Thanks to Congress’ occasional calls for more gun control laws—there were 23 MILLION such background checks in 2015!   That’s an increase of about 250%!   Consequently, 31% of American households now legally own guns.  And that’s withOUT  Congress  intentionally TRYING  to increase gun ownership!

Of course, those of us who live in urban centers know that ANYONE can get ANY kind of gun they want—by merely “getting word out on the street”; gun control laws are largely useless and ineffective. In fact, even though it’s been illegal for convicted felons to own a gun since at least 1993, police here in New Haven ROUTINELY arrest and charge people with violation of this Very Same statute.

Just like illegal drugs, if you want it, you can get it—regardless of the law.

HOWEVER—inspired by Congress’ example—I will introduce  some variant of “Gun Control” legislation on a MONTHLY  basis—for the SOLE  purpose of stimulating the economy AND creating a manufacturing renaissance!via the numerous industries tied either directly OR indirectly to gun manufacturing, such as steel and aluminum mills, other metal refineries, custom machine shops, hardwood and plastics suppliers, etc., in addition to the gun factories themselves.

Ct gun factory worker tinified

This will cause a predictable, PROVEN, monthly boost to the economy—AND create jobs in one of the few industries that still makes things right here in Connecticut!

Christopher Schaefer:  using PROVEN methods to Stimulate  the Economy and fostering the kind of growth that Creates  Jobs!                                                   

14. Deficit Reduction.

Both Democrats and Republicans have failed miserably to address the massive and growing Federal Deficit which will BURY the next generation of Americans. To deal with this growing crisis, I will introduce the

Paperwork INCREASE  Act.

This bill will REPEAL the Paperwork Reduction Act of 1980. Anyone who deals with single-stream recycling knows that today recycled materials are a Virtual Goldmine—that actually Generates Income for cities!    My bill will expand this money-maker to the Federal  level, by producing massive amounts of useless, wasteful, redundant paperwork —which THEN can be sold to recycling companies!

recycled-paper tinified

This Single  Act  will COMPLETELY wipe out the Federal deficit within a few years AFTER  I have completed my 12th term as  your Representative.

I personally guarantee it!

15. Foreign Policy.

I will introduce the “Get Them Before They Get Us Act”.  This bill finally will give our President the blanket authority to invade and Utterly Obliterate virtually any country that seems to be even the least bit threatening.

HOWEVER, to prevent the imprudent misuse of this massive new power, ALL military interventions will require that the President him/herself—along with ALL 100 Senators—suit up in military gear—and PERSONALLY lead all military interventions with their own “boots on the ground”.    The exclusive use of  fighter jets, drones, long-range missiles, etc. to fight wars—without  these SPECIFIC “ground troops” of President and Senators—will  be prohibited, thereby ensuring our Senators’ and President’s real-time  participation.

Trump Commander in Chief

And—just like George Washington!—our President  once  again  LITERALLY will  be “Commander in Chief”.

16. Veterans.

When my Get Them Before They Get Us Act (see above) has been implemented, our military  veterans eventually will  be reduced to merely 100 Senators, plus any surviving retired Presidents and retired Senators.

Retired_Vets tinified

THEREFORE, I will introduce legislation to gradually phase out  the Veterans Administration—since it will become Totally Obsolete! This will save taxpayers $Billions each year!

Christopher Schaefer:  honoring and  supporting  the very Few  Veterans who will be left—while saving YOU  $Billions!

17. The War and Peace: Non-self-contradicting Act.                                          

Rosa DeLauro often has found herself in the rather awkward position of pointing out that CT’s rapidly dwindling weapons factories comprise America’s Arsenalwhile simultaneously criticizing Republicans who aren’t willing to cut the defense budget!

For Example, on Jan. 22, 2014 Rosa DeLauro celebrated tax dollars going to Sikorsky which “makes sure that jobs are coming to Connecticut and staying in Connecticut.” Then—only 4 weeks later!—Sikorsky announced SIX  HUNDRED  layoffs would take place over the next several weeks. In 2015, Sikorsky owner UTC  FURTHER  surprised and utterly humiliated DeLauro by announcing plans to sell Sikorsky. And  now Sikorsky’s NEW owner, Lockheed-Martin, lost the Marine One repair contract, so blackmailed CT by threatening to lay off even MORE workers unless the going-bankrupt CT State legislature used your tax dollars to fork over a $220 Million factory ransom payout.

THEREFORE, my “War and Peace: Non-self-contradicting Act”  which, after I have it translated from its original Russian (Война и мир) into English, will be EXACTLY  1,440 pages long,  will require that

  • “Peace Troops”  be  stationed virtually everywhere;
  • that  these “Peace Troops” be armed EXCLUSIVELY  with  Sikorsky helicopters and General Dynamics ‘Electric Boat’ submarines;
  • that these armaments  be manufactured EXCLUSIVELY  here in Connecticut;
  • that these “Peace Troops” be ready to spring  into action  at a moment’s notice—per my Get them before they get us Act (see  above);
  • that Congress must ensure that our military is the best-trained, best-equipped fighting force in the world, so that we do not walk away from our position of global leadership;
  • AND—that Congress be required to cut the defense budget by 20% per year.

Thick book tinified

Because my War and Peace non-self-contradicting Act will be 1,440 pages long, no one will actually read through the whole thing. Therefore, any contradictory statements contained therein will go Completely Unnoticed!—sparing members of Congress from the future embarrassment of self-contradiction.

Christopher Schaefer:  Raising the bar on Legislative  Double-Speak!

18. Energy, Environment, Green Jobs.

I will introduce the “Green Jobs Payback Act”. Similar to my National Infrastructure Bankruptcy Act (see above) this bill will GUARANTEE that any environment-related contractor (e.g. solar panel installer) be  given a government  contract—in exchange for contributing to my re-election campaign!  

 RELATED to this, I  ALSO  will introduce the     

19. Who Cares? It’s Their Mess Act.

Many renewable green energy components, such as polysilicon solar panels, actually cause MASSIVE pollution in places like China where most are manufactured.  Solar panel manufacturing requires caustic chemicals and huge amounts of water—which often becomes contaminated by these chemicals. They ALSO require the mining of rare or precious metals such as silver, tellurium, or indium. Silicon used to make the vast majority of solar panels ALSO requires much energy in the manufacturing process, because it is refined from quartz extracted from mines, putting miners at risk of the lung disease “silicosis”. And mining all  that quartz and precious metals requires HUGE amounts of energy—MOST of which comes from Fossil Fuels.  Coal.  and Oil. ADDITIONALLY, there is no market  for recycling solar panels  after their 20-year lifespan. Despite this, Rosa DeLauro repeatedly has stated that we “need to have half a billion solar panels installed within four years” to make America “the clean energy superpower of the 21st century!”.

FORTUNATELY, today most solar panel manufacturing, along with its highly toxic byproducts,  has been relocated to China, Malaysia, the Philippines, and Taiwan.

THEREFORE my Who Cares? It’s Their Mess Act will ensure that THEIR pollution REMAINS their pollution”, by outlawing the manufacture in the USA of environmentally hazardous “renewable green products” such as solar panels and mercury-laden fluorescent bulbs. This bill ALSO will outlaw the domestic manufacture and recycling of all electronics—which likewise creates MASSIVE amounts of pollution.

pile_of_cell_phones tinified

Let’s work together to keep America “clean and green”, preserve our vital ecosystems!—and Screw the rest of the world.

20. Green Energy Wind Farm  Bird  Pest Elimination Act.

According to the National Audubon Society, wind turbines, an increasingly popular form of renewable green energy, kill up to 328,000 birds Each YEAR in North America alone. Yet it’s ALSO one of the most rapidly expanding energy industries: more than 49,000 individual wind  turbines now exist across 39 states. Wind turbines must be anchored in TONS of concrete—a product which creates MASSIVE pollution to produce. Additionally, they have become a HUGE eyesore, causing the degradation of formerly-beautiful, pristine, natural landscapes. Multi-Billionaire, Warren Buffett:  “We get tax credits if we build wind farms. That’s the only reason to build them. They don’t make sense without the tax credits.”

THEREFORE, to “make sense” and better use of this “renewable green energy”, my Green Energy Wind Farm  Bird  Pest  Elimination Act will provide for the humane capture of city pigeons, so that they can be relocated to these numerous, expanding wind farms—and let these sustainable green energy machines do the rest.

wind_farm_bird_chopper tinified

Christopher Schaefer:  harnessing  “renewable  green  energy”—to finally keep America’s  Windshields  clean!  

21.  Improved Food Safety Act.

Food labeling, food inspections, etc. long advocated by Rosa DeLauro, have become increasingly burdensome—WITHOUT  improving the overall  health of Americans. At All. Yet DeLauro naively continues to  insist upon expanding nutritional  labelling to just about anything that’s even remotely edible—because Rosa DeLauro is totally unaware that this information ALREADY can be  accessed in seconds via  a cell phone!

smartphone_nutrition_label tinified

  THEREFORE, my Improved Food Safety Act  finally will achieve REAL, verifiable results by  LIMITING the foods that can be legally sold OR consumed to

  • 5 popular vegetables,
  • 5 popular fruits,
  • brown rice and
  • tofu

Anything else will be Completely BANNED. This bill will save $Billions by eliminating unnecessary government food-inspection jobs AND will save $Billions in healthcare, by eliminating all diet-related illness.  Vastly reducing food selections ALSO will save consumers hours and hours of time each week in shopping, meal planning and food preparation.

Christopher Schaefer: preparing for the 22nd century—by having government make ALL decisions FOR you!

22. Enhanced Consumer Product Safety Act.

Similar to my Improved  Food Safety Act, my bill will reduce legally-sold consumer products to

  • 3 TV models,
  • 1 automobile model,
  • 1 mattress model,
  • 1 sofa model,
  • 1 smartphone modelAND
  • 25 carefully-selected video games.

playing_video_games_tinified_2_83

This still will give Americans FAR more choices than North  Koreans and—most importantly—it will  keep  Everyone.   Completely.   Safe.  

Christopher Schaefer:  Watching out for YOU, the consumer!

23. Poverty & Inequality Eradication, via Race Identity Reassignment Act.

According to the U.S. Census Bureau ACS study,  27% of all blacks live below the poverty level—compared to just 11% of all Americans.  The median wealth for Black Americans is only One-Tenth  that of White Americans. These racial disparities haven’t change AT ALL in the 25 years that Rosa DeLauro has been in office.

Yet some voters actually think that giving DeLauro  ANOTHER  2 years will suddenly make a difference!

Christopher Schaefer  has a better idea!

The Solution?

Today we know that a man who “looks” every bit like a man, including his genitals and Y chromosome —but “identifies” as a woman—should be treated as if he is a woman: this is a Fundamental Human Right, finally achieved by our more enlightened society, that has thrown off  the micro-aggression  of oppressive, patriarchal, medieval ideologies.

THEREFORE, following this same  enlightened principle, my Poverty & Inequality Eradication via Race Identity Reassignment Act  will COMPLETELY wipe out black poverty—by re-identifying all Blacks—as “White”.

man half black half white

After DECADES of lame, half-assed, ineffective “token gestures” by your government, this SINGLE act will wipe out urban poverty almost INSTANTLY. Our All-Black, underserved neighborhoods and our All-Black, urban schools—which are MORE segregated TODAY than when the “War on Poverty” began 50 years ago—suddenly will no longer be met with stonewalling by Congress.

Once our Senators and Representatives  realize that these Very Same All-Black neighborhoods and schools— ACTUALLY are now officially identified as “All-White”$BILLIONS and $BILLIONS will be poured into them!

The “War on Poverty”, launched in the 1960s by hard-core Southern segregationist President Lyndon B. Johnson, with his now-famous words “I’ll have those Ni’african American-gers voting Democratic for the next 200 years”, FINALLY will achieve its ultimate victory!

Christopher Schaefer:  Curing  poverty once and for all—by switching labels!

24. Immigration Reform: via Universal Unlimited Temporary Visa Act.

Rosa DeLauro jabbers constantly  that she is working hard to “create a path to citizenship for law-abiding families who are here”—which conveniently overlooks the fact that, if they’re here illegally—they’re NOT “law-abiding”!  DeLauro essentially would make citizenship meaningless.

Republicans, on the other hand, continually repeat the mantra “Secure the borders!”—like we’re not ALREADY trying to do so. Mexican drug  gangs have proved over and over that they easily can climb over—or tunnel under—any barrier or “wall” we create. And their speedboats easily can outrun any US Coast Guard vessel.

HOWEVER,  MY plan is the ONLY plan that is reasonable, fair—and actually will work! My Universal Unlimited Temporary Visa Act finally will resolve this contentious issue—AND improve the quality of life for Americans. My bill will revoke EVERYONE’s citizenship and replace this with a “temporary” visa—that has NO expiration date.

Visa tinified

Because EVERYONE in America will be here on a “temporary visa”, then if anyone breaks any municipal, state or Federal law—no matter how minor—they IMMEDIATELY will be deported. Within MONTHS this law will have a DRAMATIC effect on the quality of life for the few of us who will be left! A neighbor blasting loud music at 2 am? GONE! Obnoxious driver who cuts you off  because they’re texting while driving? Outta here!  Kids terrorizing your streets with dirtbikes?  So long!!

In addition to improving the quality of life in America, my bill ALSO will save $Billions! Police forces will require far less officers. Prisons will become almost non-existent—because CRIME will become almost non-existent.

Of course, members of Congress will be exempt from this bill because, well…because Congress USUALLY exempts itself from its own laws, until some “whiney people” complain about it.

Christopher  Schaefer: Vastly improving the Quality of Life for those Left Behind!

25. Salvaging US Postal Service via Historic Re-enactment Act.

Republicans have no plans for salvaging the Post Office; Rosa DeLauro wants to throw even MORE of  YOUR tax money into this dinosaur. My Salvaging US Postal Service via Historic Re-enactment Act finally will preserve this nostalgic throw-back to yesteryear. Historic re-enactments of battle scenes, etc. have become a HUGE, money-making draw for tourists. Drawing inspiration from this, my bill will require all mail-carriers to wear historic uniforms from the 19th and early 20th centuries. Additionally, what little mail is actually still sent by the USPS will be delivered via horse and buggy.

1th century postal delivery

The $Billions saved THEN will be used to provide  every American with a free email account, on a private server, using 5G technology, as well as a FREE basic smart phone AND data plan! This will preserve an authentic piece of Americana, while closing “the digital divide“.

Christopher  Schaefer:  bringing ALL  Americans into the Digital  Era—while promoting  Historic  Preservation!

26. Social Values: ‘Show Me the Money; I’ll Support it’ Act.

For the past half century or more, voters’ opinions on sensitive “social value” issues such as abortion, euthanasia, same-sex marriage, government-paid sex-reassignment surgery, recreational drugs, gun control, etc., etc. have been shaped almost EXCLUSIVELY  by the entertainment industry.

THEREFORE my bill  finally will  bring accountability to the  entertainers themselves:  each year during the Emmys and Oscars, all participating celebrities will be required to cast a PUBLIC vote—similar to Congress—requiring these, our most outstanding  intellectual elites, to give their highly informed  opinion on the various “social value” issues of the day.

Miley Cyrus

After casting their vote, each celebrity then will be asked to donate $10,000 apiece to my re-election campaign.   Even thoughI’m personally opposed to or personally in favor of various issues,  my LEGISLATIVE support for such issues then will be determined EXCLUSIVELY by the most “generous” campaign donors! This will free virtually everyone—including me!—from developing a consistently logical,  carefully researched “personal opinion” on these topics!

Christopher Schaefer: bringing both integrity AND accountability to Social Value issues AND restoring America’s competitiveness—among campaign donors.   

27. Fighting for Seniors? Why bother??!

Even though Rosa DeLauro has done virtually NOTHING what-so-ever to preserve Social Security or Medicare, she constantly blathers that we must protect these outrageously expensive, unsustainable, Resource-Sucking Programs that provide services for Connecticut’s  fading senior citizens.  In response to her blatant, insincere pandering to seniors—solely to garner their votes—see my It’s Time To Go Act” (above).

28. American Colonial Expansion via Foreign Aid Act

It’s been well-documented that current methods of distributing food aid make countries MORE dependent, because most aid is diverted via corruption. Consequently, local food production actually DE-creaseshttp://www.povertyinc.org/

Poverty Inc tinified

Additionally, through her work on the Agriculture Appropriations Subcommittee, Rosa DeLauro has helped boost USA’s “renewable, sustainablebiofuel production—by turning 50% of our corn crop into “sustainable” ethanol gasoline additive—which has caused further, MASSIVE food shortages in poorer nations: http://www.realclearenergy.org/charticles/2013/03/18/is_ethanol_causing_food_riots_106927.html

Nevertheless, a similar technique of creating food shortages was employed by Great Britian during the height of its colonial expansion. Western “values” were imposed and the flow of food and other goods was controlled by local, corrupt pawns of the British, thereby weakening local resistance. Even though the British Empire is largely a thing of the past, the poverty and constant political turmoil in places like India, the Middle East and Africa remain its enduring legacy.

And we Americans long have admired all things British. For example, what we today refer to as a “traditional wedding” (white gown, wedding march “Here comes the bride”, etc) actually originate with Queen Victoria’s wedding. We even call American 19th century architecture “Victorian”. Americans also have a great fondness for British-like hereditary dynasties, e.g. Roosevelts, Kennedys, Bushes, Clintons.

Queen_Victoria

THEREFORE, my “American Colonial Expansion via Foreign Aid Act” will expand upon our Anglophile leanings, as well as our belief in “American Exceptionalism”, by ensuring that USA foreign aid is contingent upon acceptance of “American values”.

SPECIFICALLY, aid workers will assist local governments in adopting USA-style “democratic institutions”, whereby elected officials will learn how to disguise bribes, graft, money-laundering, kickbacks and cronyism as “campaign donations”—just like here in the USA!

Christopher Schaefer: Ensuring that “the Sun  never Sets on the American Empire!”

29. Angry Rant Replacement with Humor Videos.

Trump_Hillary_DeLauro_very angry tinifiedTrump is angry! Hillary is angry! Rosa DeLauro is REALLY angry! These people are all $Multi $Millioniares; so why are they so f_ing Pissed Off? I thought money is supposed to buy happiness!

However, as your next Representative in Congress, once the money starts pouring in,  I  personally will have the opportunity to see if money really CAN buy happiness! And THEN, I will report back to you, my constituents, and let YOU know whether or not it’s actually TRUE!

In the meantime, as a member of Congress, I promise to make a short YouTube video approximately every week, explaining the laughable idiocy that takes place in Congress on an almost DAILY basis.

And, as a member of Congress, I’ll  NEVER run out of comedy  material!

Christopher Schaefer: making  politics fun  again!

30. Community Service Payback.

If you go to SeeClickFix New Haven http:///users/2974   and check out my profile (I use my real name, Christopher Schaefer with dragonfly avatar), you’ll see that I have earned 28,000 Civic Points! That’s MORE than just about  ANYONE else in New Haven!

SeeClickFix User

And  DeLauro? She doesn’t even HAVE  a SeeClickFix account! What kind of lame “public servant” is THAT??!

But, quite frankly—I’m getting SICK of this “Do-Gooder” crap—and the fact that I’m willing to publicly admit so, is why I can  claim to be

“the ONLY honest politician in America!”™

I believe it’s finally time for me to cash in on those Civic Points!  And there’s simply no better way in America to brand yourself as a “public servant”—while realizing the American dream of becoming Filthy Rich—than by becoming a member of Congress!

And now, with  28,000 Civic Points—MY  TIME  HAS  COME!!

After laundering campaign donations through her husband’s business and right back into her own pocket for over 25 years, amassing a personal fortune now exceeding  $26MILLION—while accomplishing almost nothing else!—

it’s time for Rosa DeLauro to give somebody ELSE a chance  to become a $Millionaire.

And that somebody is me:  Christopher Schaefer.

Although I’m a white guy, I’ve lived for decades in the “Hill”, one of New Haven’s poorest neighborhoods, which is over 90% Black and Latino. DeLauro, on the other hand, has lived (well, when she’s actually in Connecticut) for YEARS in New Haven’s wealthiest, nearly All-White neighborhood, on Prospect Hill (and recently took an apartment in one of New Haven’s most up-scale buildings: “The Eli” on Church Street).

At this point in my life, it’s time that I had MY chance to experience the upside of America’s ‘de facto’ racial segregation and live in an All-White neighborhood—like Rosa DeLauro ALWAYS has.

Campaign_Greenspace_tree_tinified

For YEARS  I’ve walked around my neighborhood nearly every day picking up litter, reporting criminal activity, planting trees and flowers with my neighbors, laying blankets on sleeping homeless people on the New Haven Green.

Now I want MY chance to follow DeLauro’s example: live like a one-percenter while making token gestures of  caring  about all you little people. 

 And THAT is why I, Christopher Schaefer, am

“the ONLY honest politician in America!”™

⇒ The Serious Stuff

YOUR  QUESTION: “Ok, Chris. Enough with the sarcasm, already! I’m convinced our government is totally corrupt—and that Rosa DeLauro is one of THE worst, most hypocritical offenders.   But you’re just one person: how can YOU possibly change this? And what are you REALLY all about?”

MY  ANSWER: Now that our main choices for president are Hillary versus Trump,

Trump_Hillary_clowns_campaign_tinified

most of you finally have come to the realization that BOTH political parties have become utterly, incorrigibly corrupt and completely disconnected from the People—from YOU!                                                    

I believe the FIRST way to fix our corrupt, broken, failed, 2-party system is with a Constitutional amendment, imposing

Term Limits

limiting Representatives and Senators to a maximum of TWO terms.

YOUR REPLY: “But that idea will go nowhere. Somebody introduces such an amendment to Congress EVERY year. Congress has the best deal going! They’re not going to change ANYTHING.”

CORRECT: The Republican platform always calls for Congressional Term Limits—yet none of them has ever resigned after 2 terms, to enforce their alleged convictions. Democrats never even mention Term Limits—because, in their silence, they acknowledge that Term Limits would kill the Personal Wealth aspect of elected office: the PRIMARY Reason why both Democrats and Republicans seek elected Congress.

That’s why  we must bypass Congress to impose Term Limits—and there ACTUALLY  is a way to do this! Which FINALLY is starting to get traction! It’s by invoking Article V of the Constitution, which allows for a “Convention of States” to pass Constitutional amendments themselves—withOUT the approval of Congress! While a number of proposed amendments are being tossed around, the amendment that’s getting the MOST attention and the most support is Term Limits for Congress. Why?

Because voters—like YOU—are angry and totally disgusted with Congress.    

If you elect me as your Representative, I will use this “credential” to travel to all 50 states, in coordination with other organizations committed to Term Limits, and push state legislators to convene such a “Convention”—for the Sole Purpose of imposing Term Limits on Congress. If two-thirds of state legislatures submit applications proposing Constitutional Amendments which all pertain to the same subject matter, then an Article V Convention of States MUST be called.

And listen, I’m not naïve: I’m well aware that laws RARELY are passed purely “for the common good”. Rather, nearly ALL legislation is motivated by politicians’ desire to please donors and their most vocal constituents—PRIMARILY so that he/she will be re-elected. Even history’s most ruthless dictators knew that to stay in power they had to keep ‘some’ people happy—or at least maintain the ILLUSION of a “happy, contented populace”. However, Term Limits minimize these corrupt motivating factors—because politicians only can be re-elected ONCE. Therefore, with Term Limits, “the common good” takes a much more prominent role.  More info here:  http://www.conventionofstates.com/responses_to_convention_of_states_opposition

ANOTHER WAY to fix our broken government  is with

a “partial” Budget Referendum—via your Federal Income Tax Return.

Currently, the only option you can check on your tax return is whether or not you want $3 of your tax money to go towards financing…  (get ready for it…) Presidential.   Elections. I know: that sounds like the punch-line to a joke—but unfortunately, it’s true!                         

My “partial” Budget Referendum bill will allow YOU, the voting tax-payer, to check off FIVE broad categories where 10% of your taxes—that’s 50% TOTAL—MUST be spent. The first year, this would be merely “suggestions”. That would give Congress ONE YEAR to get their act together and re-prioritize spending, based on what voters actually want—NOT what their campaign donors demand, NOT what politicians or their political party’s platform SAYS we must prioritize.                

After the first “trial year”, Congress will be required to follow the aggregated percentages from ALL tax returns. 

This bill would have a radical impact on government function—and corruption.

YOUR REPLY: “Are you kidding??! Congress will laugh at such a suggestion!”

ANSWER:  Not if YOU the People hold  MASSIVE protests—DEMANDING such legislation! Remember: the government belongs to YOU—NOT  Congress!!

A THIRD ISSUE that is destroying our country and THE thing that fuels illegal immigration is the

“War on Drugs”

Our federal government spends over $44 billion per year on the War on Drugs, including law enforcement, court costs and incarceration. Our government ALSO spends HUGE amounts of “drug war” foreign aid money and equipment—often inadvertently to groups who themselves are involved in large-scale narcotics-trafficking, such as corrupt politicians and members of the Mexican and Colombian military. This fuels economic growth derived from the drug trade, while institutionalizing terrorism. In recent years drug-related violence has resulted in tens of thousands of deaths in Mexico and Central America—most attributed to supplying OUR country’s underground market.

Yet such massive expenditures have had virtually NO impact on drug usage in the US. The inability to intercept MOST drugs smuggled into the country helps drive up the dealers’ profit margin, encouraging producers to provide more drugs, despite the risks.

Participants in the drug trade cannot go to court to settle disputes. Thus, when drug deals go bad, the result is often deadly violence. The underground status of drugs also exacerbates many public health problems, such as adulterated drugs, which recently led to deadly overdoses here in New Haven. Because those arrested for nonviolent drug offenses are overwhelmingly young, poor, black or brown, the current War on Drugs is a primary source of strained relations between police and urban communities.

As your Representative, I will sponsor legislation to establish a National Commission on Drug Policy, to initiate an unbiased, informed, science-based discussion about humane and effective ways to reduce the harm caused by drugs—and caused by current drug policies—to our citizens and to our society. The aim should be to reduce harm related to drugs—as well as the harm caused by current drug policies and to promote the health and security of our citizens and our communities.

Rosa DeLauro’s plan? Demand more Narcan  overdose  antidote. 25 years in office—and that’s it.  Really!

Right, Rosa. Now, toddle on back home and go back to selecting the wines for next week’s gourmet banquet in your $2 Million mansion…                                   

HEALTHCARE:

ObamaCare is the perfect example of how our government no longer works, because it has become stridently, uncompromisingly partisan. Democrats consider ObamaCare like the Bible: nothing may be added, nothing may be taken away. Republicans hate this bill and will do whatever it takes to repeal it (which means a Republican candidate should avoid the Fair Haven Health Clinic, where ObamaCare paid for a $1Million expansion…)

Meanwhile, Yale-New Haven Hospital is quietly BYPASSING this partisan, dysfunctional squabbling, by buying up as many hospitals and private physicians’ practices as they can. They essentially are creating a single-PROVIDER system for much of our state: not because they’re an “evil corporate monopoly”; they’re doing this to SURVIVE. And remember: this hospital is one of THE biggest employers in the area! If they crash—like St. Raphael Hospital did—the consequences will be devastating.

My prediction: At some point in the not-too-distant future, I’m expecting Yale to offer its own health insurance at a discount rate—for those who receive their care at Yale-New Haven Hospital facilities. They’ll need to get over a lot of regulatory hurdles, but they’re nearly at a point where they can FORCE the issue—since they have a huge healthcare monopoly already. I believe Yale’s own “single PAYER healthcare system” will happen—without any government plan and by utilizing “free market” concepts in their own way. (And meanwhile, Democrats & Republicans still will be fighting over ObamaCare…)

URBAN  POVERTY

is another area where our government has been a total failure—again, due to partisan dysfunction. Republicans consider welfare programs a scam; Democrats want to continually expand welfare programs—only so that urban folks will keep voting for Democrats.

After living in New Haven’s “Hill” neighborhood for over 30 years I CAN say that the current system is merely a Band-Aid and does very little to lift people out of poverty.

So what DOES work? 

Home-grown programs that empower local residents. Some of my favorites:

Guns Down, Books Up https://www.facebook.com/groups/GUNSDOWNBOOKSUP/  is a non-profit that gives inner-city youth MENTORING and an outlet to express themselves with music, education, arts and athletics “keeping the youth of today on the path of tomorrow”.

If I am elected your Representative, I will donate $20,000 of my OWN Money to this non-profit! (Ya hear me, Raymond Wallace?)

Kitchen at CitySeed AND New Haven Farms use local food, grown in their own gardens—and Cooking Classes, using this same food—for rebuilding culture and community, improving health and reducing obesity in poor neighborhoods. (And this is infinitely more effective than Rosa DeLauro’s food labels or soda tax…)

Criminal Justice Reform

I realize that for many voters this is an unpopular topic and potentially suicidal for a politician to even bring it up—which explains why, in her 25 years in office, Rosa DeLauro has NEVER addressed Criminal Justice Reform. And this is despite the fact that DeLauro claims to be be “rooted” in New Haven—which has THE greatest need for such Reform. (Just stick with the “safe” issues, Rosa.  Like menu labels…)

CT Democrats claim that by “banning the box” on job applications (which an applicant checks if he/she has a criminal record) that they “will remove barriers to help formerly incarcerated individuals successfully re-enter society”.

This, of course, is Vote-Buying,  Feel-Good crap.

All serious employers routinely do instant background checks on applicants: not only criminal record, but also credit check and eviction record.  CT law subjects employers to a $300 fine if it can be proved that they discriminated solely due to an applicant’s criminal record. Since hiring ALWAYS has involved subjective judgement, it’s difficult to prove discrimination on ANY grounds: race, gender, etc. And many employers will gladly pay that $300 fine rather than take a chance on an ex-con.

THE ANSWER. What’s needed is a tiered, systematic, consistent, goal-oriented method for ex-offenders to gradually have their record cleared:  a method that is NOT purely up to the discretionary whims of a pardons board, but that also ensures public safety. Earning a record expungement is the only REALITY-based way to rebuild our broken, one-parent families and destroyed urban neighborhoods. While some might consider a one-size-fits-all NATIONAL system to be ideal, it’s not possible due to each state’s sovereignty on such issues.

HOWEVER, as your Representative I will help New Haven’s Re-entry Program coordinate “best practices” from all 50 states, so that our neighborhoods—MY neighborhood!—can recover from the wreckage of mass incarceration. I ALSO will work with other countries to create more reciprocal agreements. TODAY, even if an ex-offender has his/her record expunged, this is NOT recognized by our neighbor Canada. Therefore, despite expungement,  an ex-offender is barred from entering Canada. I will work to change this—withOUT compromising public safety. Rosa DeLauro’ plan? “Raise the Wage”—for people who are barred from employment. Great plan, Rosa…

Other things I favor:

  • Replacing our “winner takes all” elections with a more fair and representative alternative, such as ranked-choice voting or proportional representation (although, realistically, these are changes that need to be made at the STATE level, since states always have regulated most details of the election process).
  • Constituent Services: Much of the “constituent services” for which Senators and Representatives regularly hold press conferences to take credit for—ACTUALLY are handled by their office staff, including ALL of the correspondence related to such services—and arranging the press conferences so that people like DeLauro can take credit for “their services”. I favor a MAJOR overhaul of these tasks, by transferring such “services” to non-partisan local Federal offices, so Senators and Representative can do the only things they’re SUPPOSED to do (with expert assistance): legislative agenda-setting and related research and studying/voting on bills that finally reach the floor for a vote.

     If “constituent services” were removed from the duties of Senators & Representatives, then even without Term Limits voters finally would realize there’s NO reason to keep voting for the same photo-op-seeking, perpetually-campaigning, careerist politicians over and over again—because, despite all those blathering  “press conferences”, voters finally would realize that incumbents like DeLauro are NOT responsible for all those grants, belated military awards, etc. etc. you read about: ALL of it ALWAYS has been done by their staff. Of course, such a radical change in “constituent services” also would mean that Congress only would need to be in session for about 2 weeks each year. Hard to justify a $170,000/ year salary for 2 weeks of work—which is THE reason why this idea ALSO will go nowhere. Well, at least YOU  know where my political focus lies: ending the massive  corruption and cronyism that infects Every Aspect of YOUR government.

  • Discarding our ENTIRE tax code, and implementing a progressive tax with no deductions. (Right; good luck with THAT one, Chris.)
  • Eliminate unopposed races (or races in which the perpetual incumbent only has “token” opponents—like me!) by removing ballot access barriers. By CT state law, I only could register as a Write-In candidate less than 3 months before our November 8 election! How am I supposed to match Rosa DeLauro’s $1-Million campaign war chest in only 3 months? Not that I actually WANT to, because

I Accept NO campaign donations!

This is a “People’s Campaign”:

if you want REAL reform, then it’s up to YOU to “advertise” my candidacy via email, word-of-mouth and social media: Facebook, Twitter, etc.

The news media will pretend I don’t exist:

it’s up to YOU to change that!

Return honesty and integrity to government. Vote for Write-in Candidate

Christopher  Schaefer

The ONLY candidate telling YOU the voter how YOUR government  REALLY works!

Independent    Un-Affiliated,   

—AND an Officially-registered Write-in Candidate for CT’s  3rd Congressional District:

Your write-in vote for me really  WILL  count!  

I’m your REAL alternative to either more of Rosa DeLauro’s crap or the GOP’s “token opponent”

My candidacy is no  joke!         

Easter portrait Wooster Square campaign tinified 

Even though Rosa DeLauro  is!

DeLauro_rags_campaign_tinified

 

On Nov. 8  WRITE-IN my name,

Christopher  Schaefer     

And together, let’s  peacefully  overthrow this corrupt government!    Today:  greater New Haven.  Tomorrow: the country!                

How to write-in a vote for me:

  1. At the top of the ballot, locate the column that says “Representative in Congress”:

ballot_top_1_campaign_tinified

  1. Go down that column and you’ll see Rosa DeLauro listed—twice! That’s because she helped create a fake 3rd party, “Working Families”, to get her name on the ballot in two places—basically turning the ballot itself into a free “campaign ad”! Her corruption never ends—not even on the ballot itself! Keep going all the way to the bottom of that column, where it says WRITE-IN VOTES

ballot left column 2 campaign_tinified

  1. Now, under that SAME column that says “Representative in Congress”,

use the marker-pen provided to fill in the oval. That’s IMPORTANT! Otherwise, the optical scanner will not read your vote.

THEN write in my name:  Christopher  Schaefer.

It’s a good idea to write my name on a piece of paper ahead of time—make sure you spell it correctly!—and bring it with you—along with a fine-point pen. My name is rather long; you’ll have to write really small–but legibly–for it to fit:

ballot_bottom_3_campaign_tinified

That’s it!

If you—and enough of your friends and contacts in the 3rd Congressional District—write in my name, YOU will have taken the first step to starting a Revolution! ***

** NOTE: By CT State law, a write-in vote counts ONLY if the person you vote for is officially “registered” with the Secretary of State, as a write-in candidate for that specific officeAnd I am!! So a write-in vote for me Really Counts!! (see my  certified registration below)

*** CT’s 3rd Congressional District includes the following towns: Ansonia, Beacon Falls, Bethany, Branford, Derby, Durham, East Haven, Guilford, Hamden, Middlefield, Middletown (part of), Milford, Naugutuck, New Haven, North Branford, North Haven, Orange, Prospect, Seymour, Shelton (part of), Stratford, Wallingford, Waterbury (part of), West Haven, Woodbridge.

Not sure if you’re registered to vote? You can check here: http://www.dir.ct.gov/sots/LookUp.aspx

You can register to vote here: https://voterregistration.ct.gov/OLVR/welcome.do

You can register as Democrat, Republican or Unaffiliated [ = “independent”; no party—like the majority of Connecticut voters…]

Past party affiliations disclosure:

I have been “unaffiliated” aka “independent” for nearly ALL of my life. However, back in 2011 when Clifton Graves ran in New Haven’s Democratic Party primary, I switched to Democrat. I actually believed that Attorney Graves could make a real difference in the way New Haven operates. It was that election that finally made me realize that in New Haven “The Machine” anoints their selected mayor ahead of time; the election is merely a formality. Then, in 2012 Wayne Winsley—who grew up in a ghetto housing project—ran against DeLauro as a Republican. I thought this was a young black man who really could speak to the urban population. So I registered as a Republican. Wayne is a nice guy, but he wasn’t able to move beyond standard Republican/Mitt Romney talking points. Turns out, Wayne wasn’t even from the  3rd District; he merely rented an apartment here to “legally qualify” as a candidate.

So then I went back to being what I always HAD been: unaffiliated—like the MAJORITY of registered voters today. (So, what does that say about the Democratic and Republican parties?…)

And  I will remain Unafilliated/”independent”, for the rest of my voting days. 

NOTE to New Haven Bernie Sanders fans:

DeLauro was a MAJOR player in rigging the Dem. National Convention against Sanders. DeLauro transferred her own campaign money to the DCCC, which was used to pay actors $50/day to occupy seats intended for Sanders delegates. DeLauro also arranged for Hillary “supporters” to meet Hillary in a PRIVATE photo op in New Haven: private, because your “representative” DeLauro knew Hillary has no support in New Haven. You can read about this here: http://www.newhavenindependent.org/index.php/archives/entry/hillary_for_feminist_america/

and HERE: https://vid.me/4tYB

Below is my officially certified write-in Candidacy form, certified by the Office of the Secretary of State of Connecticut:

write_in_candidacy_form_received_campaign_tinified

Facebook_Cover with Text campaign

Oh, and a final note: If I’m elected, I really WILL make those Congressional political-humor YouTube videos…

Print-it-yourself Flyer! Also sized for Facebook sharing! [JPG photo format]

Anyone with a smartphone can scan the QR code, which will bring them to this website:

qr_campaign-wordpress

Here’s a square version, better suited for  Instagram sharing: 

qr_campaign_instagram-4-wordpress

on Facebookhttps://www.facebook.com/ChristopherSchaefer4Congress/

on Twitterhttps://twitter.com/Schaefer4CT

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Author: christopherschaefer

Christopher Schaefer has lived in the 1871 “Lane-Hubbard House”at 84 Second St., New Haven, Connecticut since 1986 and abhors our crony, corrupt political system. Interests include micro-landscaping, guerrilla-gardening, local history, historic preservation. He has been married to the same woman for over 36+ years and has 2 adult ‘children’. He has Gilles de la Tourette Syndrome: if you have a problem with that, then he 'probably' has a problem with YOU. He’s willing to lend tools to his neighbors, but if one of them doesn’t return something–that’s it. He always enjoys sightings of an incredibly beautiful, exotic rooster that wanders the streets nearby. Every Sunday morning, he attends a Catholic Mass that’s ENTIRELY in the ancient Latin language, down in Norwalk, CT: a living-yet-ancient connection with innumerable generations of his ancestors. ChristopherSchaefer4congress.com